Reading body language: So you have met your date and you have done everything that you can to make him or her feel comfortable with your body language after you have given them a chance to read you.
You were smart and looked up how to read body language articles on the internet before you met. You found out about proximity, where to stand, how to sit, the appropriate places and amount to touch and even what to look at.
The most important thing you can do know is to react to his or her body language correctly after you have read them.
It has already been said that reactions to body language is just as important as reading the body language. Now this is just as important in a first date setting as it is in a business setting or even with a family member.
Your reaction to how someone is communication with you nonverbally can perpetuate a situation or stall out bad feelings.
She is flirting and she says she like your style…
You smile, but you don’t believe her and your smile isn’t real and dont understand that it was a compliment as was as a message to flirt with you.
She now feels self-conscious and like she had given a compliment and you didn’t like it, now she thinks maybe you are not into her.
Now she is uncomfortable, she slouches in her chair. Her body language reads hurt.
You react seeing that you made a mistake and overcompensate by becoming rigid and puffing your shoulders up or even take a deep breath.
The situation becomes uncomfortable and you lose out and so does she because it will be tough to recover from this situation.
Remembering that your subconscious runs ahead of your brain by a slight moment in time does not always make reactions easier but it should be a good reminder for you to be gracious when you get a compliment “I appreciate that you noticed” is a good line that fits into any compliment and can be used just about anywhere. Substitute “I appreciate that you noticed” into the situation above and the outcome becomes better as long as the smile is real and the voice you use is genuine.
As a side note you can screw a compliment up really easy when you say “Its not that big of a deal” because now you have just discounted a compliment that someone has taken the time to give you voiding the complement into their head. Now enter the reaction of their body language that you can read showing disappointment.
First dates should be fun and not awkward letting go of setting up for the perfect moment will allow you to have some fun. Where people go wrong after learning how to interpret and read body language is that they try too hard to make things happen or they go too far reading into a situation. Understanding body language and the reactions of body language can help you take your first date into your last first date when your react correctly.
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I would like to thank you in advance for your comments and or questions about reading the body language of a first date.
Now go implement!
Scott Sylvan Bell
Photo credits:Young Lady Showing Thumbs Up by photostock, Lovers by Rosen Georgiev