Reading Body language: When looking or reading the body language of men there is a simple 9 step process that helps you understand what nonverbal communication is happening
The first 3 steps in reading his body language for business, datting or seduction or even safety are:
1. Proximity or distance from the person or the people involved
2. What position is his boy in compared to others?
3. Where his hands and what are they doing?
The next three steps in reading his body language consist of determining a few more things that will help you decipher the situation and what is going on between him and others.
Step 4 – Reading men’s body language – look at his feet
When looking at a man to determine what his communication is you will look at his feet. Now the feet will either consciously or subconsciously point to what he is thinking about or what he may be interested in you.
Is he thinking about the woman over in the corner? He may start by pivoting his body and then will eventually get the courage to go over and flirt with her, he may already be engaged in flirting with the woman and he is waiting for the perfect time to go over and chat her up.
In a business setting the body language of his feet may be saying that he needs to leave, the new potential client is long winded and he has a meeting to get to. His feet or even maybe one foot will point at the door and a way saying “I want to go that way and get out of here.
So there is the potential when reading his body language of a man that it may be he is either interested in something going where his feet point at that person or object on or uninterested and then will point his foot or feet at that object or person.
In the instance of non verbal communication the feet may determine the direction of conversations and actions literally.
Step 5 – Reading men’s body language – look at his shoulders
The next step while reading the body language of a man for dating or business is to look at his shoulders in context of his feet. If he is standing the second he points his feet any other direction than forward his shoulder will dip towards the direction that his foot is going.
There is a very simple body language exercise of standing and directing both feet directly at the wall in front of you and then slightly start to twist the right foot and start to move it towards the wall to your right. If you do this in a mirror you will see you shoulder drop.
This same exact nonverbal cue will happen for men or for women so it is important to note that your shoulders will be a gibe away for whatever your feet are doing.
The shoulders will also determine the amount of self-confidence that he may have. If his shoulders are drooped there is a possibility that he lacks confidence especially if his chin is down. Now be careful here because it may be that he is tired and or that the chair he is sitting in is not comfortable this is where the signs and signals of a man’s body language may be misinterpreted. This non verbal communication of the shoulders must be looked at in context of everything else that is going on and not just by itself.
If the shoulders are up and the chin is up there is a good possibility that everything is ok with what is going on around him. There is one clue as to if there is danger or stress and as his shoulders will be rolled back and more than likely his fists will be balled up if there is confrontation going on between him and others. This puffing up is a natural reaction of a fight or an altercation.
Learning how to read the body language of men does take some time to learn and there is more elements to look at nonverbally than just one specific body part.
Step 6 – Reading men’s body language – Look at his posture
In reading the body language of men the posture is next on the list now this item is similar to where the shoulders are but now you would take into account his stance and whether he is standing or sitting.
The posture will play a part in his confidence but also if he is attentive to what is going on.
If the man is sitting and he is slumped forward do you think that he is interested in what is going on around him? Is it possible for him to see everything that is going on? If he is out looking for a woman or a partner can he see the cues or the flirting action of others.
If he is at work can he pay attention to what is being presented to him if he is in a meeting?
Does he seem confident as to what is being said or being presented?
In most instance his posture will determine his body language and most of the nonverbal emotional cues that go along with it.
If he is flirting with a woman or a man his posture should show that he is interested by it being attentive. This does go back to primal days when people had to “peacock” or make themselves more attractive. “Peacocking” is a term used by pick up artists or seduction artists. If he were to slump down this effect would not be possible. When animals are in the mating mode they take up as much space as they can to be visible so their posture goes straight up and whatever parts of the body can go out to attract attention follow. Now this “peacocking” animal style would be a bad idea for a man who was trying to attract a mate to put his arms as far ways from his body as possible or to try and take up as much room as possible as it would go against social norms and he would lose social value. If he were trying to seduce a mate he would “peacock” on a smaller scale.
Body language or nonverbal communication exercise
As a body language exercise stand up straight with your shoulders out and with your chin up breath in deep and exhale deep (but not too much where you pass out) and try and feel sorry for yourself or even try to not feel confident. Now do what you would to feel confident.
Now do the opposite stand up and roll your shoulders in chin down and breath slow and shallow and try and feel confident or excited.
What did you find?
If you did the exercise you would find it is hard for you to be in a good state of mind when your body language goes against what you are thinking.
As always I would like to thank you in advance for your comments and or questions about the body language of men or women.
Now go implement!
Scott Sylvan Bell
Photo credits: Business Man by Andy Newson, Man With Sunglasses by photostock