Body language of mirroring

Mirroring body language: There are plenty of cool things that you can do when it comes to learning how to read body language or even interpret the nonverbal signs of men or women. One of the most important items that you can learn to help your persuasive abilities, best of all when done right you have some covert skills and it’s all nonverbal.

 

The term mirroring means that you would do nonverbally what the other person does:

  • ·         They woman touches her face, you touch your face
  • ·         She crosses her legs you cross your legs
  • ·         The man smiles you smile
  • ·         You yawn and then she yawns
  • ·         He touches you, you touch him back

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Wait it means that the mirroring and body language goes both ways?

 

Yes it does and you may have not ever noticed that salespeople may have mirrored you.

 

There is a point where you build enough rapport where they may start to follow you and then follow your lead (pace).

 

Body language mirroring of similar not exact

Mirroring body language can go wrong and that is for a few reasons and it makes your actions overt instead of covert:

 

Too similar too soon means that your reaction is too quick and that is a common body language mistake. The whole idea for your mirroring or copying is to be covert and not overt. When mirroring is done right the other person may or may not know that you are either pacing them or mirroring them.

 

Many times when people hear about or are shown mirroring they become too eager to get started and their movements are so quick that it isn’t really natural. These super skills that are supposed to help along with the process of rapport and or the persuasion process then end up hurting the person that they are supposed to help.

 

Just be patient when learning this new covert body language skill and you will be rewarded.

 

Body language of mirroring of similar

When mirroring a man or woman your bodies actions only have to be similar.

  • ·         When she touches her face you can touch you’re a few seconds later but do not touch it in the same exact spot
  • ·         When he crosses his legs you can wait a few seconds or a moment and then you cross your legs

 

 

Body language of pacing and leading

Pacing and leading is a strategy from NLP. Pacing means that you are following a man or woman. Leading would be when they are following you. Now throughout an interaction you can switch up the leader or the pacer.

 

You will know you are in good rapport when it goes both ways. At some moments it may be a body language strategy to give up some power and follow a man or woman and in some instances you may want to be in charge and have them follow you.

 

Body language of mirroring and touch

Now when it comes to touch there are common mistakes that you can make. In real time if you are waiting 5 – 10 seconds after someone makes movement for you to copy you will want to wait a few seconds longer if this action has to do with touch. You will have to practice this out with another man or woman that you know but you cannot tell them what you are doing to so that you can get the timing right. You can let the man or the woman in on your secret after you have practiced a few times. Mirroring touch has to feel natural or the situation will become very awkward.

 

Touching too quickly is also a common body language mistake.

 

Body language of mirroring and where to practice

How to learn body language made simple. You can practice mirroring body language anywhere and find it to be an effective use of nonverbal communication. You can just sit down at the coffee shop and watch a man or woman out of the corner of your eye and do a similar action and then when the man or woman changes their position you wait a few moments or even seconds and then do something similar but not exact. You may even want to watch the distance that you keep from the person when you make the touch so that you know where your proximics are or the “bell bubble”

 

Normally when someone hears about mirroring or wants to learn about it they make this common mistake for body language and that is to move too quickly.

 

As a side note while mirroring a man or woman out in public they may come over to you and ask questions like “Do we know each other”? This action is common along with them interacting with you somehow.

 

You can literally practice mirroring men or women’s nonverbal actions anywhere and get the same type of results. You may notice the next time someone is trying to influence you that they start to mimic or mirror your actions. You will be able to tell how good they are by their lag time or if they have just started by their ability to covertly mirror others.

 Learn how to read body lanagueg and get the most advanced knowledge possible:

As always I would like to thank you in advance for your comments and or questions about the body language of mirroring.

 

Now go implement!

 

 

 

Scott Sylvan Bell

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Body language expert Scott Sylvan Bell shares body language and mirroring: Video credit

Body language mistakes

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Body language mistakes: Now there are so many things that you can do right when using body language to be more persuasive. You don’t have to be an expert to know about body language that can offend others.

 

Now think for just a second about when you get to see a hidden message that others have not. It may happen on television or it can be something that you catch out of the corner of your eye. Now what if you were the one who made the body language mistake?

 

Body language mistakes in a covert manner

It is possible to have some covert messages or even embedded commands build into body language or non verbal communication. Now some of these messages are so strong that the “non verbal” element really doesn’t matter and the message really isn’t covert anymore.  

 

Salespeople make the body language mistake of letting their minds go on autopilot and allow their facial expressions and or hand gestures to display what they are thinking without thinking. The response that may happen is not always the best. In this instance the potential client does not have to be the best at reading people he or she is not engaged anymore and the chances of business happening are slim to none when these covert body language messages are caught.

 

The first thing for you to know if you live your life in a profession that requires your ability to persuade others is that your body language mistakes can be caught and beat. It is best for you to know about body language or nonverbal communication to help you understand the signs and signals that may allow others to interpret your message incorrectly.

 

Body language mistake of fingers

In the western culture it is common to point with your index finger, the digit closest to your thumb. Its not nice to point and this hand gesture can get you in trouble when done wrong because it can trigger the “rejection mechanism” in the mind of the person being pointed at.

 

There are some people who point with their middle finger …

 

And those people create problems for themselves with the covert body language mistake. Their message may not have a negative non verbal element but when the person gets caught by the brain with the hidden or covert body language message it is tough to recover because who is going to confront a person about being “flipped off” as its called here in the United states or even “flipping the bird”

 

What is body language? Very destructive when perceived wrong is the answer..

 

Its best to not point with anything but your index finger when need and if at all possible it is best to use a pen when available or an open palm. You don’t have to be an expert at reading people to know when the middle finger is used to convey a thought or message.

 

Learn how to read people like an expert with this course on body language

 

As always I would like to thank you in advance for your comments and or questions about common body language mistakes.

 

Now go implement!

 

Scott Sylvan Bell

 

Video credit: Body language expert Scott Sylvan Bell – Body language mistakes  

Reading the body language of car salesmen

Reading body language: Car salespeople almost invoke the same amount of fear into people as IRS agents. Being able to read the body language or non-verbal communication of car salesmen may just take away some of the fear before you walk on the lot.

 

Before you read the body language of a car salesman it is important to know what your body language is doing or what your communication is doing nonverbally. If you are uncertain of anything your nonverbal communication will show this.

 

Now there are times to be scared but dealing with salespeople is just like dealing with anyone else. Time will be what is on your side or what is against you. Your body language will show hungry or tired so the best game plan of going into a dealership means that you have enough sleep. When you get hungry your defenses go down and you will make decisions that you may not have wanted to previously. You will have issues of buying if you are tired.

 

For you have the best chances of getting what you want it is a good idea to eat before you go to a car lot and to also bring some food and drinks with you. Now besides getting your loan from a bank or credit union before you show up on the car lot food, drinks and a calculator are the best things to have in your arsenal.

 

On your end while buying a car your body language can give up your position or your beliefs.  The best thing for you to remember on your side is to not give up too much reaction or too much emotion. Be careful to not show:

  • ·         Fear
  • ·         Anger
  • ·         Frustration
  • ·         Excitement at some stages

 

Now as you enter a car lot there are things that you should know. On any lot there are behind the scene games going on and you enter the game without even knowing. As you drive up there is a “fight” between salesmen as to who is going to get to talk to you. In some instances it is up to who is selling or who is not.

 

As you get out of your car you may be given up on by the salesman who wanted you as a “client” previously because the way that you look or the clothes that you are wearing.

 

You will be approached by a rogue salesperson who may ask if they can help you. For some dealerships this may not be able to happen until you put your hands in your pockets or look tawards the front of the building. If hand in the pockets are needed of or the look to the building is required the people who are the spotters will signal the salespeople to meet with you.

 

Your first salesperson is there to read your body language and get some information from you to see if you are a good potential client for the sales team. If you are a difficult buyer and the salesmen is experienced he will signal the people in the tower who are watching to send over a new salesperson in a few minutes.

 

This signal that he uses will seem like normal body language, he may straighten his, run his hands through his hair, adjust his jacket or even actually signal with his hands in a way that you just think that he is using nonverbal communication.

 

The salesman is reading everything about you, he has more than likely done this before and you are not the first person that he has “sold” something to. He or she will be able to tell more about you than you think just from a few minutes, yes you are being judged and it may not be fair to you but that is how it works.

 

Once you decide you want to take the car for a test drive you enter into a sales funnel and everything has been engineered for you to buy something.

  • ·         The test drive is meant for you to take ownership and get used to being behind the wheel.
  • ·         Part of the test drive should be on the freeway to get the feel of what it is like to go to work
  • ·         Driving on the side streets is to get the feel of what it is like to drive to the store
  • ·         If you are married or in a relationship it is now time to switch seats and get the other person to drive.

 

You look at the other person and give the “nod” or “wink” and the salesperson reads your body language and know that it is time to go deeper into the funnel.

 

You go back to the dealership and go from a large lot to a big office and then into a smaller cubicle. There are signs everywhere that are meant to prime you with numbers to get you used to seeing dollar amounts as high or higher than monthly payments or even as much as the car. The signs around the area will have people smiling or families together once again more primes.

 

You then sit at a round table and you are sat together so that the salesman can watch the both of you being separated is a difficult thing to deal with because the salesman cannot see you make signals or winks. Know that in some places there may be cameras to look for your nonverbal communication and to look for your readiness to move forward.

 

Being brought to a smaller area is done on purpose to make you feel tighter, closer but also to control you more.  

 

The car salesman may give off more covert signals to his helpers once again along the lines of a hand sign, moving a tie, tying a shoe or just about a million other nonverbal communications to signal where the sales call is going.

 

Know that the more that you are consumed with information the more difficult it may be to keep up so that small items are slipped in. Using a 4 square sales process is a way that the information difficult to keep up with.

 

The salesman is looking at your body language bit also listening to phrases you say like: “When we get this car home” or even “I can’t wait to take this car to….” Your words are signs that you desire ownership.

 

At this point whatever “deal” you came up with will fall through and the salesperson may get disappointed and show signs of stress with his body language. The salesman may rub his head, his chin or the back of his neck. He may say things like: I cant believe this has happened” or “let me go talk to my manager”. This is all done on purpose to give you and the other person with you time to talk and get your game plan together. No in some places the sales floor may have a microphone on it and what you are saying may be head, in some places you may be on video and your nonverbal communication is being watched.

 

The salesguy or girl will come back with a counter offer and get excited for what he or she came up with. The deal that he or she has will be slightly more than what you wanted but you will be asked to see if you can make the payment or take a car with fewer options for the same amount as the car that you were shown.

 

Once again your body language will be watched for your buying signs and or signals. The phone may ring with a last minute offer and the call is scripted and in some instances there may be tones in the phone that tell the salesman what type of credit you have. His body language has been scripted and he or she has been coached as to what to do exactly, it is no mistake.

 

From here you either make the deal or you do not. Know that you becoming tired and putting time into the situation are done on purpose because once people have invested significant time into something they typically will not walk away. Know that if you are slightly tired or hungry it is easier to get to yes and a sale.

 

A little of this information will go past body language but it is good to know what you will do and pay before you go to the car lot. Having your budget set and knowledge of your credit helps you more than you would know. Having financing before you go to the car lot will give you an upper hand with negotiating but remember reading body language for you and the salesperson has a great deal to do with reactions.

 

Know that there are many great salespeople who will do the right thing for you in most situations and just like everything else there will be those few who ruin it for the “good guys”. As a side note not all car lots are bad or use deceptive behavior but it is good to know what to look for when there are the ones who bend the rules of ethics.

 

As always I would like to thank you in advance for your comments and or questions about body language.

 

Now go implement!

 

Scott Sylvan Bell

 

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