Body language of licking lips

Body language of licking lips: Just for a minute imagine you are sitting in a meeting and the question about the new project goes to Joe and all of the sudden he starts licking his lips. And you think “wow this is unusual I have never seen Joe lick his lips, what on earth does it mean is he lying or is he excited”?

Or

You ask your boyfriend where he was and all of the sudden all of his body language changes into something not normal. You see him say “I was with Steve” pause … pause … licking his lips  “and we went to a new bar” as he looks away. Could this be a sign and signal that your boyfriend is lying or did he really go to the new bar?

Or

You go to a new bar and you look over in the corner and notice this girl who winks at you and slowly starts licking her lips. You pull out your phone and Google “Body language of licking lips” to find out how to interpret this sign or signal. Was that a sign of overtly flirting with you, was she thirsty or were her lips chapped?

 

Now it very well may be that licking lips means nothing …but just in case you decide it’s time to find out what the body language of licking lips means.

 

There are plenty of times where people lick their lips and there can be a few reasons why they do so.

  • ·         Out of necessity because of lack of moisture
  • ·         Excitement about an idea or thought non sexual
  • ·         Out of habit
  • ·         Nervous tick
  • ·         Caused by a lie
  • ·         Suggestive

 

Every day reason for licking lips

Now just think for a moment when you were out in the sun and were hot or even possibly when it was really cold and your lips were chapped. Did you lick your lips? The chances are great that you licking your lips meant absolutely nothing but that it was needed. Now if someone were in your peripheral they could read into a little differently. This is a reminder why you need to take a look at what the normal actions are of the person are who you are looking at while interpreting their body language.

 

Excitement and licking lips

There are some people that when they get excited about anything they lick their lips. This rush of energy has to go somewhere for them and the lips are the answer. You would see this as a common trait or action that happens. You would want to know this baseline before making a decision as to whether or not they are lying or if they are just excited about a thought or belief.

 

 Habit of licking lips or biting lips

There are also men and women who have developed the habit of licking or biting their lips over time and it means nothing except that it is a routine behavior. On the other hand if the man, woman or child has a normal behavior of licking their lips and all of the sudden in a situation that normal behavior doesn’t happen there might be a reason for it and it may not be good or it may need nothing at all. This means that it’s time to ask some questions to gather further information about what is going on.

 

 Nervous action of licking lips

On the next spectrum of the level from the body language of licking lips is the nervous tick or action. It may be the pressure of a tough question or an uncomfortable situation or room that would cause one to change their behavior and display. In this nervousness may fall the issue of lying but it doesn’t mean that there is a lie. It could very well be nervous energy just like a man or a woman tapping their foot. In fact you may see foot tapping and lip licking at the same time.

 

 Lying and licking lips

It could very well be that the man, woman or child that you are looking at is asked a tough question they pause and then they lick their lips with another pause and then answer your question. This may be a flat out sign that they are lying but be careful because remember it may be nervous energy. If you are a woman / girl and ask a guy do you love me? If he’s not ready be to answer this question be ready for all sorts of nervous behavior and stalls but even then it doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you or he’s lying that’s just a tough question all of the sudden.

 

In the case of lying you are looking for abnormal behavior or an action that is not a normal routine for the person that you are looking at. Sometimes it may seem that licking the lips may be a symbolic greasing of the lips to get the big whopper of a lie out of their mouth. This action may take place as a way to get another half a second to figure a story out.

If you spend some time watching the television show “Cops” you will see the suspects start licking their lips after a few tough questions are asked with long pauses or short pauses. Are the suspects lying before or after they lick their lips? Quite possibly but this show is a good place to look and watch for the signs and signals of lying.

 

Just remember before you try and confront your girlfriend, boyfriend, husband, wife, kid or coworker of lying look for abnormal behavior then question about it. You may see other signs you have never seen before or you may see normal routines remember the baseline their behavior first.

Seduction and licking of the lips

In the example of the woman licking her lips at the bar that would be considered overt behavior to induce behavior from you or whoever it was generated towards. The licking of the lips may be considered sensual when directed towards a person. Now this is the body language that movies scenes are based upon. You may see a man or woman lick their lips when they meet a new person and they may not even know that they are doing so. Just remember that this may be some nervous energy or it could mean something else entirely. This action may take a few minutes or it may happen instantly depending on what is going on in the mind of the two and the type of chemistry that they have.

 

Now there may be a tendency to look at the lips when a man or woman licks them but you may want to be careful because staring at the lips may be seen as being sexual. So all of the sudden you get excited that someone is licking their lips and you start staring and the other person takes your body language as sexually advanced and that’s not what they were licking their lips for.

Licking lips for many reasons

There may be more than one reason why a person would or could lick their lips while some of them may be good others reasons may be bad. It is important to take the time to learn the behaviors and characteristics of a person’s routine actions or baseline them to determine what their action means or could be interpreted to mean.

 

Understanding body language can help you determine what the actions that other people mean. Learning how to read body language can be fun and also done at home:

 

Now go implement!

 

Scott Sylvan Bell

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Body language expert Scott Sylvan Bell explains the nonverbal action of licking lips: Video credit

 

Body language of James Bond

 

Body language of James Bond: Imagine the complications of being a world class spy. Reading the nonverbal actions of James Bond does require you to think a little more about body language than most people.

 

There are so many facets to a person Like James Bond and the actions that he takes along with the person that he has. Thorough out his day there are plenty of activities that he has to achieve:

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James Bond and the body language of seduction

One of the things that the British spy James Bond is known for is the women that he seduces. There are times when James is a pick up artists and seduces the women he needs to get the valuable information from or he just may be attracted to them. James knows how to get close to the women invading their proximity or Bell bubble touching them, facial expressions or using eye contact to get their attention. The women are usually intricate and beautiful but there is normally a twist where they get James into trouble.

 

James Bond and the body language of spying

While out in the field James Bond must spy on people or activities there are times where he has to get attention and draw out the villain. Sometimes the actions that James takes nonverbally like dropping something or throwing something to get the person or the group of people to take action so that he knows who to chase or even fight. There are also times where James must use covert body language and hide in the shadows so that the man or the woman that he is chasing can lead him up the chain of villains  

 

James bond and fights

As James goes through his journeys one of the things that he has to do is fight with some of the villains or the super villains. Now some of the times he has to strike first and sometimes he is surprised and has to fight for his life. Sometimes this fighting is from James seeing the body language of the villain tense up or picks up on a micro expression and explodes into action. Once the fight is done there are times where the nonverbal communication of the fight can be seen from the clothes being torn or some blood. There are also times where you cant tell from looking that James was in a fight.

 

Body language, emotions and facial expressions of James Bond

There are plenty of moods or emotions that James bond has to live up to also some of these emotions may show up in the body language or nonverbal communication while some of the emotions may show up as micro expressions.

 

As the super-agent there are times where James doesn’t get along with  his leaders and usually shows contempt for their orders.

 

Being the super spy that he is most of the time James Bond shows confidence in his actions most of the time whether he is with women or driving his car after a villain. There are times where he shows frustration and either kills people, crashes cars or breaks things.

 

Many people would consider James bond arrogant because of the way that he carries himself and in some instances he is. Understanding what type of spy he is and what type of insane villains and dictators he must deal with may explain his arrogance against people. Since he is the best at what he does he may just exude confidence so he would walk tall with his chin up, walk at a fast pace in stride, shoulders up and have great eye contact.

 

 

While trailing villains James does have to lower his profile and use covert body language.  Hiding in the background he has to either walk faster or slower than the people that he is chasing after. He may have to duck behind cars, sit in the shadows or use some gadget to peer around corners to see what his nemesis is up to.

 

James bonds clothing and superhero articles  

When taking a look at the clothing and gadgets of James Bond some of the articles could be considered super hero articles. That would mean that they have some sort of special power of ability to give him more confidence. As a general rule James wears clothing and suits form the top designers.

 

James Bond Reading Body Language

As a spy James Bond would have training to read body language, nonverbal communication and micro expressions. Chasing villains that are trying to kill him or destroy a country or the planet while seducing women would have to require more talents than just being able to talk, drive and kill people. It would help James to know the signs and signals of lust to danger.  

 

Learn how to read body language

Whether you are reading the body language or the nonverbal communication of James Bond or learning how to read people for sales or negotiation this home study course is the best route to learn the signs and signals of peoples actions.   

 

As always I would like to thank you in advance for your comments and or questions about the body language of James Bond.

 

 

Scott Sylvan Bell

 

 

 

 

 

Body language expert Scott Sylvan Bell explains the body language of James Bond: Video credit

Reading body language games

Reading body language: Learning how to read people through the use of analyzing body language can be fun.

 

Sure you can read how to look at each body part, learn how to interpret facial expressions of eve go online and study how people interact through proximity. What will really help you learn how to read and understand body language better is to dissect it in real life.

 

Reading body language games to learn nonverbal communication
Reading body language games to understand body language

 

Reading body language can be learned by games

When people want to learn how to read other peoples nonverbal actions they are shocked about where to gain these skills and capabilities.

 

The first Reading body language game can be played with a few people by going out to a bar about 10:00pm or later. Just know that your job is not to drink you are there to learn. When you are done learning then you can drink. There are some very specific reasons why you want to choose a bar. People will let their guards down after a few drinks. Their actions in some instances will be exaggerated and reading their body language can and will be easier because of it.

 

The way that this body language game goes it to figure out a person between your group and then determine what the nonverbal communication means. Now you can get away with more silliness when you are at a bar with people who are drinking. You can even get other people involved in your “game” and they will have fun also.

 

When you think that you have determined what has gone on go over and buy the guy or girl a drink and ask them. Let them know you are doing a body language experiment and they will let you in on what is going on. If they decide that they do not want in on your fun try with another person.

 

Watching men hit on women or even guys who think that they are pick up artists (PUA) can show you the body language of rejection all of the way to the body language of seduction that you can read real time. If you are close enough you can hear the interactions between the men and women. The benefit for you is that you get to learn in real time and see just what some nonverbal actions are.

 

Reading body language games to increase communication skills
Reading body language games for interpretations of nonverbal signs

 

Reading body language for sales as a game the blank slate surprise

Under pressure people dominate traits come out. If you are in any type of sales the best way to make this happen is through surprise. You can learn not just a lot but a ton from being put under pressure. This works especially well when this sales training technique is videotaped or recorded to watch later.

 

The setup for this even is simple. A person goes shopping and picks up a few items:

  • ·         Small lunch sacks (brown and not see through
  • ·         Random taboo products think adult novelty toys
  • ·         Random items from the house

 

You then take the items and put them in the brown bags and put them on a table on in a box. The salesperson is given 30 second to look at the item while it is still in the bag. Once the salesperson has had their time to look at their item they then do a 2 minute infomercial on the “product” that they have in the bag.

 

This game that can be used to learn about body language reading will show what the salesperson does when they are nervous, what they do when they are confident and what they do when they get stumped. The communication when verbal or nonverbal will show every flaw or even perfection.

 

Some of the best items for this game are ones that are taboo and that can create the most discomfort or embarrassment.

 

For salespeople who are more advanced there is no 30 second prep time for the “actor” it the infomercial is instant. This puts even more pressure on the actor because there is no preparation time. No matter how good the salesperson or “actor” is this body language reading event will show some sort of weakness in the nonverbal communication skills and signs.

 

This “game” needs to be recorded on film so that the actor can watch what they have done because if you just tell them they will not believe what was done. The actions of their hands, facial expressions and general body language can be dissected slowly and even repeated over and over again.

 

Now you don’t have to be a salesperson to benefit from these sales games you can be a person that just wants to learn how to read nonverbal actions. Your dominate traits will come out on film and you can determine what actions that you do can get you in trouble when communicating with others.

 

Reading body language and nonverbal communication to become an expert can be learned here.

 

I would like to thank you in advance for your comments and or questions about games you can learn to read body language.

 

Now go implement!

 

Scott Sylvan Bell

Girl Holding Message Board by Kittikun Atsawintarangkul, White Board Model by AscensionDigital:Photo credits for reading body language games

Reading body language of flirting men and women part 2

 

Reading body language: Flirting is one of the most misunderstood concepts when it comes to others reading the body language of men or women, in the last article on reading body language the head was used to describe some of the ways that a man could be flirted with along with a woman.  

 

Understanding what communication is being presented in front of you may help you to determine if someone is interested in you for more than just a friendship. Reading the body language of flirting will go into other items besides the actions of a man or woman’s head tilts, there is the art of reading facial expressions.  

 

Reading body langauge of flirting while winking
Reading body language of women flirting

The facial features of flirting can include using

  • ·         Eyebrows
  • ·         Eyes
  • ·         The mouth

 

Using eyebrows to flirt

There are very specific things that people will do to flirt with a man or a woman and there can just be one thing used in their body language that can be read into. When a person is using their nonverbal communication and eyebrows they may arch them quickly once or twice to see if the other person is receptive to the advance. In some instances the flirter will make sure that their message is seen and will arch their eyebrows a few times. If done too many times towards a target that is being flirted at the flirter may be seen as being desperate or even that there may be a lack of social value.

 

Part of the fun for some of the people who flirt with others is the thrill of the chase. Once this flirter reaches and gains the attention of their target they may just give up and move onto the next person hat they wish to target.  So as a side note there are people out there who just are flirting to get a quick fix of attention.

 

Once someone has possibly used their head or eyebrows they may use their eye or eyes to gain attention they may even use their eyes to grab your attention. When people use this nonverball communication there may be a few things that can be done:

 

1. Flirting action of Winking – This wink can just be from a quick action or they even wink once slower than what you would think. The downside is that you may think that someone was flirting and they may just have something in their eye.

 

2. The flirting action of batting the eyes – Sometimes women while flirting will bat their eyes or flutter them at a person that they may interested in. This is not as common as a wink at a person to flirt with them.

 

3. The flirting action of the stare – Sometimes to get the attention one may stare to at a person to flirt with them or use this action for a while until the other person looks and then the eyebrows can be arched or a wink can be used. 

 

4. How to flirt with your mouth. Sometimes while flirting will blow a kiss and even sometimes as a overt action some will lick their lips. It is good to know that sometimes people may unconsciously lick their lips when they are attracted to you. Sometimes even a smile can be considered a form of flirting but it will really depend upon the situation. As a side note if you stare at someone lips while they are talking to you and this is not a situation where flirting is involved it can be looked at like a sexual advance.

Reading body language of smiling while flirting
Reading body language can include flirting amd smiling

 

While being flirted with the nonverbal communication from the other person may be overt in nature or almost covert depending upon the situation.  Knowing what each action being used with these body language techniques can help you land a new friend or even just to learn to have more fun.

 

As with reading the body language of other people there are times where you can be right with your interpretation of the actions or you could be wrong.

 

Body language exercise

One of the things that can be done to practice flirting is just to arch your eyebrows once with a person whether you are interested in them or not. The nonverbal communication exercise can be done just about anywhere but if you are married or have a significant other this action may not be the best idea for you.

 

As always I would like to thank you in advance for your comments and or questions about reading or interpreting body language.

 

Now go implement!

 

Scott Sylvan Bell

 

Photo credits: Young Woman by David Castillo Dominici, Beautiful Asian Woman by nuchylee

 

Reading the body lanaguage of men part 3

Reading Body language: Understanding and interpreting or reading the body language of men can be used to determine if he is interested in you as in flirting, help you know if you are being seduced or it can even help you in negotiating in a business setting.

 

Nonverbally the body says more than you would think and many times these automatic gestures or actions will allow you to read his body language quickly and effectively.

 

 The first 6 step of 9 in reading his body language are:

  1.       Proximity or distance from the person or the people involved
  2.       What position is his boy in compared to others         
  3.       Where his hands and what are they doing?
  4.       Look at the direction of his feet and what they are possibly pointing at  
  5.       Decide what his shoulders are doing to tilt his body
  6.       Loot at his posture and whether he is standing or sitting  

 

The last three items while reading his body language to gain an upper hand are not always as easy as the first six. Now nobody said that reading body language was “easy” and didn’t have any drawbacks. In most instances the combination of all of these items do help you gain a possible understanding of what is going on but there may or may not be some rules set in stone.

 

Take for instance the proximity or distance in a crowded situation people will have to be closer like at a busy bar setting the distance of his bell bubble closer than normal and this may also determine how far his hands can move away from his body. This is where it becomes increasingly important to watch the situation and figure out what is going on.

The body language of a man who is flirting
How can I tell if a guy is flirting with me? A way to read a mans body language

 

Another place where you can have some issues while reading and deciphering the body language of men is when you look at his posture: What if he has a medical condition and you make a snap judgment if he is showing confidence but because of an injury or something similar you read him and determine his body language is saying something else.

 

There is one rule that covers all the others and that is take you time to determine what his body language his saying by base lining or watching him for a few seconds or meanings to see his routines and normal actions.

 

So yes the rules do get a little complicated but by following these few steps you can determine what a man’s body language actions mean and keep you from being wrong in making snap judgments.

 

You may also have some unconscious reactions to these nonverbal cues and not really understand why unless you have previously looked into reading body language. You may have intuitively understood what things like his feet facing the door have meant but know you can tell for sure. Remember for you it matter how you react to situations while interpreting his non verbal actions mean. The ability to rad a mans body to understand his language is a skill.  

 

The last three steps in reading, interpreting and understanding a man’s body language are and can be a little more challenging.

 

Step 7, 8 and 9 – Reading men’s body language – look at his facial expressions, head and chin.

 

Now there is good reason that the last three things to look at while reading a man’s body language are all lumped together and that is because they interact with each other and rely on each other.

 

A mans facial expressions will help you determine the context of a situation. Are his eyebrows up or down, does his face show signs of stress or in other words is his jaw tight? Does he show signs of contempt? All of these items play into what reaction his body will show and can help you determine what he is saying nonverbally.

 

In most instances the center of the eyebrows going up can show signs of surprise, excitement. The eyebrows staying even can sometimes mean happiness while the center of the eyebrows moving down could be seen as anger or sorrow. Now this section of learning about what the eyebrows mean could fill pages alone and the explanation of micro-expressions would take more time and detail. Know that these are just quick generic rules and this information will be covered more later.

 

The eyebrows will set the stage for what the eyes will do and depending on what the eyebrows and face are doing the structure of the facial expression will help determine what the eyes will say about the situation.

 

Step 8 – Reading men’s body language – look at his head and the direction it is going.

 

The tilting of the head can show interest, reaction or even boredom. When the head reacts so will the rest of his body and the language that it communicates. If his shoulders are tilted his head will react also or his body’s position will look awkward. If he is interested he may lean his head in towards you while flirting but this may also happen if he is angry. This is where it comes in handy to understand what the actions of his eyebrows mean.

 

In some instances the tilting of the head away from a person can show attraction but chin would somewhat point at the person who the interest is found in.  

 

Step 9 – Reading men’s body language – look at his chin

 

Lumping facial expressions head and chin all together was done because they all interact at the same time but they are all categories of their own in a sense.

 

The chin down could mean a sign of sorrow or boredom and if a man is into you his chin may only go down to his chest for a second while he arched his eyebrows looking at you. Now this does depend upon the situation as does reading and interpreting most body language actions.

 

Body language of a man flirting
Body language and the interested man

The chin up could determine how much self-confidence the man has but that would also be encompassed with the other 8 steps. If the chin is too far up at may be a sign of arrogance or a stiff neck so you may want to save this body reading action for last.

 

Men do not normally communicate with their chin down to their chest and on the other end of the spectrum men normally do not communicate with their chin up as high as possible so determining where the correct or normal location can help you understand or interpret what state of mind he has or possibly even an emotion that he is feeling.  

 

 Reading body language note of caution

It is always important to note that these are all general guidelines and do not always 100% determine what is going on. Depending on where you are in the world and the social situations they could be wrong. It is a good idea to watch and see what reactions the people have who are interacting with others before judgments are made. It is also important for you to look at the context of a situation before you make judgments about what is going on. Reading body language is not always an exact mathematical formula meaning A+B = C it can be far more complicated than that.

 

Body language exercises

 

The eyebrows say more than you would think, for just a second arch your eyebrows as if you were angry, so that would mean that just above your nose your eyebrows would drop down and your eyes may squint.  How does that feel for just those few seconds?

 

Now open your eyes and arch your eyebrows as if you were surprised. Now in just those few quick instances how did either one of those exercises make you feel? When you are done reading this information try it in a mirror and see what your reactions are. Last try looking at a partner and do the same items to see what your reactions would be.

 

*As a side note this exercise may not help you if you decide to test this out on a person unless you let them know first what you are doing or you may just get a chance to interpret what their body language along with some verbal communication is saying*

 

 It is important for you to see what your body does and the possibilities of your reactions so that you know and understand what your own body language is saying so that you can identify what other peoples body language is portraying. Next let’s take a look at head tilts:

 

Now look and think about something in the room that you can see and would be interested in get interested in it and become curious about it. Did you tilt your head towards that thing you are interested in or thinking about or did you tilt your head away from the item or did you even tilt your head at all? Where did your chin go towards the item or away, to your chest or did you raise it?

 

Now do the same exercise as if you were angry with the item. Are you tilting towards it or away from it? Where does your chin go when you are not happy vs where does it go when you are happy?

What did you learn about yourself and how you communicate?

 

As always I would like to thank you in advance for your comments and or questions about reading body language.

 

Now go implement!

 

Scott Sylvan Bell

 

Photo credit: Businessman Sat Talking On Mobile Phone by Ambro, Loving Couple Look Each Other by photostock

 

Reading body language: Are you making these common nonverbal mistakes?

Reading body language: How do I avoid making people uncomfortable while communicating effectively? This is a common question that is asked of those who know how to explain body language or nonverbal communication.

 

The answer isn’t always that simple.

 

Sometimes people just don’t get it or they just don’t care. When communicating with others there are nonverbal things that can be done to make the people who are being spoken to entirely uncomfortable and when these offenses are done it could be a complete accident or the pther person is oblivious as to what they do.

 

Have you ever walked away from a person and have not understood why you were uncomfortable with what they said to you, or it could have been you were just creeped out and walked away with the chills?

 

Chances were that the body language or the non verbal communication skills of the offender were not that good or they were just someone who lacked social skills so that their style of communication was unusual and or very uncomfortable.

 

Do you make these common body language mistakes?

 

Here are some of the ways that you can unconsciously offend those around you and cause your message to not be delivered. Now it doesn’t matter if you are in sales, looking for a boyfriend or girlfriend or just talking to a friend you can make these mistakes.

 

Body language of the eyes: Now for many people visual contact will make or break the way that your message is or not delivered. It usually isn’t the lack of eye contact that causes a problem it is the location at which the people look. Here is the most common issues that people find themselves in besides lack of eye contact:

 

  • ·         Staring at the lips, not this is usually a sign of sexual advance and not the best way to nonverbally communicate while talking to a man or a woman unless it is a sexual advance that you want.
  • ·         Staring at body parts, now for men it is difficult to look at some women without  looking at specific places especially when the clothing allows a distraction.
  • ·         Shifty eyes, there are some people who just look at everything and it seems as if there may be a possible drug problem.
  • ·         When having a conversation with a person the best area to look at is across the eyebrows to the bottom of the nose. If you would like to make a person uncomfortable you can stare at their chin or forehead and this can be used as a ploy for some negotiators.

The rules of nonverbal communication include proximity

 

When it comes to making people uncomfortable with body language next on the list would be proximity or how close people are to you. There are a few offenses that people can make when it comes to not understanding proximity that should be used in a given situation. Here are the most common mistakes that people make when identifying the distance that can be comfortable while communicating.

 

  • ·         Standing too close to the person who you are talking to. This is uncomfortable and causes the person to not listen to the message but question in their head “why is this person standing so close” the whole time you are talking to the
  • ·         The opposite of standing too close would to have a conversation form an uncomfortable distance. When communicating either verbally or nonverbally there is an acceptable distance to stand away from the person who is communicating with you. If you are too far away it just seems strange and doesn’t feel like the message can be delivered. The communication is strained and then has a tough time being effective.

 

Does body language include touching another person, or is that seduction?

 

Last on the list of uncomfortable body language or nonverbal communication skills is touch. If you are a man there is a double standard for sure when it comes to touching another person. It is perfectly acceptable for a woman to touch a man or a woman but when the situation is the other way around it is not always acceptable for a man to touch a woman. This is a social norm you can’t really change.

 

Some people will move too quickly with touch if they are attracted to the other person, it may seem like it is a hypnotic response where touch seems required in their mind but it is too much too soon.

 

  • ·         Touching someone too soon into a conversation or even a relationship is not a good idea. Kinesthetic people or those who are more touchy feely have a tough time with this boundary and then do not understand why there is such a bad reaction to their style of communicating. If you touch a person before you have acceptable rapport can cause mistrust or even cause a confrontation. This can be confused by them because they as a kinesthetic person do not have a problem standing or sitting in close proximity to another person.
  • ·         Touching someone in an inappropriate place is a huge offense. Now you may not think that some places would be off limits so the best place to touch a woman is usually on the upper arm from between the elbow to the shoulder. If you do not know the person very well the upper arm is the only location to touch besides the top of the hand when appropriate. Now this rule may be entirely different if you are trying to attract or even seduce another person.  

 

Your ability to deliver an effective message is up to you. Your body language and non verbal communication skills are going to determine what people think when they are done with a conversation with you. What communication is may not always be defined by you.

 

To learn more about the different styles of learning or modalities NLP or Neuro Linguistic Programming would be a good start to build better rapport or even to learn how to communicate more effectively. This would include kinesthetic, visual and even auditory modalities of learning.

 

As always I would like to thank you in advance for your comment and or questions about body language.

 

Now go implement!

 

Scott Sylvan Bell

 

Photo credits:

Reading body language: How to learn to read body language or nonverbal communication, an easy guide

 

Reading body language: While reading body language there are many things that you have to do as an observer to get a better understanding of what is going on between the people or group and their nonverbal communication.

 

It isn’t always the case where a person can just walk up and instantly know what is going on between a group or even between two people without making mistakes.

 

It has been said many times that a baseline or understanding has to be met to see what is going on. People who read body are sometimes seen as mind readers or clairvoyant but it may be from their training or previous experience.  If you jump to conclusions you can find yourself in some trouble or even in a confrontational setting.

 

There are so many situations where being able to read body language will give you an upper hand whether it is in your personal life, business life or even your dating life.

 

While looking at the body language of people there are only a few situations where it can be done:

  • ·         Live: where you are there in the moment looking as the situation is going on. You have only one chance to make sure that your reactions happen the right way and there is little room for error or bad judgment.
  • ·         Picture: You can look at a picture of series of pictures to determine what has happened the downside is that you are getting such a short sample of what has happened and you may be wrong as to the context of your judgment.
  • ·         Video: you get a snapshot in time as to how interactions between people have worked out as an added benefit you can stop and rewind a situation to look at it again.

 

If a picture is used this is only one small frame or snapshot in time for what has been happening but it doesn’t tell you exactly what was going on before. Video is a better format when possible to help understand what is going on with body language of friends or family. Being live or real time has the most amount of scrutiny because if you make a bad decision there is no going back.

 

While interpreting nonverbal communication there are a few things that you are looking for to decipher the situation.

 

 How does proximity affect body language interpretations or understandings?

The first and most telling of these situations would be proximity. Determining how close people are to each other will help you see the situation for what it is and for what is going on. While reading the body language of men or women the first thing to decide is what is or would be an appropriate distance to keep between the people.  

  • ·         How close are the people standing or sitting?
  • ·         Are the people within the “bell bubble” or the 18 inch distance from the body

Body language test #1

 

Stand face to face to a friend or relative five feet apart and slowly get closer to each other and note where either your decide that you are o close for comfort or their body language shows that that they are uncomfortable. It will be beyond a sight in some instances you will just feel uncomfortable.

 

Directions of the body and nonverbal communication

The next thing to look at while reading body language would be the body and or the direction the people are facing. This is going to show you inconsistencies or incongruences for things that may not be working out

 

  • ·         Are the people sitting, standing
  • ·         Where are the feet pointing if you can see them
  • ·         What is the trunk of the body doing?
  • ·         How are the shoulders sitting

 

The feet will help you understand if the person being viewed wants to get away from the situation because now the trunk of the body can follow. Is the body saying that the person needs to get away so that the shoulders are at a strange angle or are they showing closeness? In most instances people who are close will have their shoulders parallel to the other persons shoulders no matter how they are sitting or standing. Sometimes when the shoulders are at a slant moving away from the opposing body this could show that the person needs to get away but this is not always the case. If the shoulders are off congruency the rest of the trunk of the body will be also.

Body language test #2

To test this out sit in a chair and face your body towards a person, now you will keep the trunk of your body straight while twisting your shoulders slightly to your right. How do you feel about the person that you are facing? Now ask them how they feel about you. You can have them perform this same test just to see what it feels like. How do you feel about the body language that is being displayed when you get too close?

 

To take this body language test one step further have a conversation where you would feel like you would need good eye contact to practice with: meaning not a real conversation but one where you could imagine the both of you talking about something semiserious.

 

What communication is consistent between the two of you and where does the communication drop off?

 

 The context of touch and body language

 

Now you can determine what type of touch is going on while looking at the non verbal communication. The context of touch will be telling as to what type of relationship the people have, while learning about body language the context of touch is an important aspect to learn.

  • ·         Is the touch slight with a hand or a fingertip or is it a hug or a full body cover up
  • ·         Where on the body is the touch occurring, is it a place where a stranger would be allowed to touch or is it something a close friend would be involved with or lastly is it a lover or possible seducer.
  • ·         Is there reaction to the touch meaning is it comfortable for the person being touched or is there some issue there?

 

On the list or deciphering a situation while reading male or female body language next up the face and head will show you what is going on.

 

 The body language of your face and your expressions

 

 One of the most common areas to look to see what is being communicated nonverbally is to look at the face. This will help you understand better what communication is being used or portrayed.

 

From you looking at the peoples facial expressions does it seem like the person or people are:

  • ·         Happy
  • ·         Sad
  • ·         Scared
  • ·         Indifferent
  • ·         Nervous

These are just a few of the emotions the face can tell or put another way does each person in the situation exhibit the same emotion or is there a mismatch as to what is going on while one person has a smile the other person has a scowl on their face. If this is the case there is a problem here and this mismatch should be easily visible. Within this category would be the eyes and what they are doing.

 

Are the eyes of both parties going towards each other, are they looking at the common goal, is one person looking away while the person who should be looking that the same object obsessed with another object or person?

 

These are some of the firsts keys to look at while deciphering or understand the body language of men or women for work, fun or even seduction.

 

 As always I would like to thank you in advance for your comments and or questions about body language.

 

 Now go implement!

 

 Scott Sylvan Bell

 

 Photo credits:

 

Reading body language: How to spot a liar part 2

Reading body language: When reading the body language of deception or lies there is a long list of items to look at to determine if a man or woman is lying.

 

There is one universal body part to look at while determining if nonverbal communication is accurate.

 

While reading the body language of a man or woman it is important to get a feel for their normal activities or body language signs that are normal for them. When you have taken the time to learn people body language signals that they use when they are being inaccurate it will almost seem that you can read minds or that you are clairvoyant.   

 

Take for instance a person who is nervous when they are under pressure they will have certain things that they do constantly. It could be that they:

  • ·         Rub their hands
  • ·         Sweat when nervous
  • ·         Dressed different than what they are comfortable in
  • ·         Shift more than normal
  • ·         Licking their lips
  • ·         Playing with their hair
  • ·         Touching their face
  • ·         Abnormal movement in their chair or seat
  • ·         Lack of eye contact or over excessive eye contact
  • ·         Breath differently taking deep breathes or even staggered breaths
  • ·         Tap their feet on the ground or their hands on a table
  • ·         Directing the feet towards an exit

 

Now everyone has a go to body language or non verbal “tell” when they are nervous and it is important to identify it when possible. This idea has been mentioned quite a few times in order to remind you that under any given circumstance people will react in a specific way. This nonverbal “tell” may even include a facial expression or a signature movement with the hands or even a nod. The problem is that many times “tells” of nervousness can be the same tells that a person uses when they are lying.

 

How to tell if someone is lying with body language
Is my girlfriend cheating on me signs of body langugae

 

How to tell if a man or woman is lying!

 

So what happens if you meet a person for the first time and you don’t have a lot of time to determine if they are telling you the truth? There are a few things that will help determine if what they are saying is as accurate as their body language.

 

One way is that their story may be too good to be true or over told to make up what they think would be a deficiency in their own story. In this example the story may seem like it is pushed through and either overly detailed in areas that you would not normally ask about or seem like the story is too fast and there are too many holes that do not make sense. You would be able to look for abnormal actions like touching the face or even using the lobster claw of deception.

 

One way that commonly gets confused when it comes to reading body language especially when it comes to lying is that of the direction and orientation of the eyes.

 

NLP or Neuro Linguistic Programming teaches that by looking at the location of the iris of the eye can determine the modality of learning for a person meaning are they:

  • ·         Visual or a person who learns from sight and sees what is going on.
  • ·         Kinesthetic or a person that learns and is comfortable with touch or feels their way through things.
  • ·         Auditory or a person who learns from hearing what needs to be done and listens intently.

 

Now there is an age old fairy tale that explains that when people look up and to the left there is fabricating going on or there may be a lie going on. In NLP this would signify visual construction (Vc) and if the person looked up and to the right this would signify visual remembered (Vr). The reason that this is thought of as a big deal is because in this theory visual construction means making up a story, fabrication or changing the story or even flat out lying.

 

NLP or Neuro Linguistic Programming is not always right when it comes to any of their teachings but it does construct good guidelines for the way that things can be. When it comes to body language or non verbal communication there is not any rule that is 100% usable every time.

 

This theory of visual reconstruction would be great except that it is wrong and has been proven through a few studies done including one performed by Dr. Kevin Hogan. Police use this in interrogations, the military uses this style of lie detecting while interpreting stories about actions people have taken.

 

In some instances when men or women are lying they will not look at you while they are talking, now this may not mean that there is a lie directly going on but there is definitely something wrong with whatever they are talking about. This would also go with direct eye contact or looking someone in the eye. Now if a person has too much eye contact with you it is uncomfortable but if they do not make enough or if they break away too long at the wrong time it may be that there is a lie involved.

A good skilled liar knows this and may make the correct amount of eye contact and not really give off any signs of a lie. Most of the time when this situation happens you are dealing with a great manipulator and this type of person is great at guilting you into thinking that all of the problems and or issues are your fault. This is usually their giveaway more than
their body language and it is a verbal sign.

How to tell if your boyfriend is cheating on you
is my boyfriend cheating on me

Places to use body language signs or signals

 

Now where else could you use this information? There are plenty of places:

  1. 1.      A Job interview
  2. 2.      Dating or seduction
  3. 3.      Determining if a boyfriend or girlfriend is lying about where they were last night

 

Now what happens if you jump to conclusions too soon while reading the body language of males or females? You lose contracts, relationships, friends and you can even make some enemies. Understanding or interpreting body language and non verbal communication means you must be able to separate fact from fiction when it comes to knowing what is real and can help you or what is sometimes correct.

 

People have a tough enough time believing information and adding in the layer of detecting lies through nonverbal communication and half-truths makes this task even more difficult.    

 

What is body language? That answer will be up to you and what you think the other person communication is and how they fill in the voids of what you thinks as the viewer.

 

It is entirely possible for you to read a situation the wrong way and your reaction as it has been explained previously is what will cause a reaction in the other person. You must take the time to baseline people and understand their actions and why they perform them unless you are in a situation where you have to make a split second decision then go the direction where it keeps you the safest.

 

One of the biggest mistakes that can be made is believing that one “tell” of a body language sign or signal is a definite. One of these items is the blinking rate of a person or touching the face means that there is a definite lie. In either instance when a person uses these “tells” this is an area where something just inst quite right but does not mean that there is a definite lie. Making the mistake of saying there is an absolute tell of lying would be inaccurate. These examples could be used for politicians all the way to salespeople.

 

The key is to take you time to understand what peoples actions mean nonverbally.

 

As always I would like to thank you for your comments and or questions.

Now go implement!

 

Scott Sylvan Bell

 

Photo credits: Man by Salvatore Vuono, Woman On The Phone by Stuart Miles

Reading body language: The non verbal language of women part 3

Reading body language of women: Understanding female body language includes non verbal communication, apparel and accessories. Looking at what women decide to wear can help you determine many thins about them but specifically what women decide to wear can teach you many things about her non verbal communication.

 

When reading the body language of women there is one single item that almost every time is the one accessory that she will worry about more than anything else..

 

Now as a side note when a woman gets dressed is she more interested in dressing for the men or for the women?

 

Reading body language of women for seduction or attraction
Attract women with this nonverbal communication skill

 

Quick answer for the man or for the women?

 

Many times when women get dressed up they are doing what they can to not have other women discuss what they are wearing or how they are wearing it.

 

Many times when it comes to reading the body language of women of their non verbal communication to be more specific men do not even think of this.

 

Women know that for the most part they can do what they like for the most part and some of that may include flirting or seduction and most guys will eat this act up.

 

On the other hand the women are competing against each other for status or attention.

 

Ok so you do not believe this:

 

Next time you go out for a night on the town and you are in a small venue look at how women scan the room to check out their competition so that they “know” what they are up against.

 Know what to look at when determining female body language

They check out the other woman’s:

  • ·         Hair to see if the cut is nice and current
  • ·         Her makeup to see how it was applied
  • ·         Her top or blouse to see how it fits or even possibly to see if it is a designer label
  • ·         Her jewelry to see how extravagant it is or if she has a trophy ring (that means its big and that would equal her man has money for some reason the bugger the ring the more he loves her)
  • ·         Her chest to see what she is stacked against
  • ·         Her waist line to see if she is overweight
  • ·         Her backside to see if she is fit
  • ·         What type of nylons or possible legging she has on
  • ·         Lastly they look at other women’s shoes

 

All of these items are then added up in some mental mathematical size up and then deducted from her beauty or lack of and then a decision is made about what type of competition *she* is.

 

Now in all of this there is one accessory that has more weight than most items…

 

… and that would be her shoes.

 

If you are a man and you think you know about the non verbal communication of women and you don’t include her shoes into the equation you have made a mistake.

 

For women shoes make the outfit and are the keys to the kingdom.

 

Readinge the nonverbal communication of women and their shoes
Learn how to read the body language of women

 

Guys worry about their body language sometimes if they think about it. What women worry about has many more aspects they worry about facial expressions or features, body language signals, non verbal signs of flirting and so much more.

 

How understanding the body language of women can help with attraction

 

Now if you wanted to impress that special woman that you meet one of the best ways to grab her attention may be something you may have thought of as a joke.

 

The best non-verbal feature to comment on for a woman is her shoes. Now if you are looking to strike a conversation in a manner where you may be attracted or flirting there does have to be some finesse when it comes to making the comment on one of the most important accessories ever made for a woman.

 

Guys look at shoes as a part of clothing women look at shoes as one of the single most important inventions ever next to chocolate. For woman shoes make and finish or complete the outfit. For guys they are just boxes and boxes of costly shoes in the closet with funny names:

  • ·         Peeps
  • ·         Sling backs
  • ·         Pumps
  • ·         Flats
  • ·         Wedge
  • ·         Loafers

And the list can go on not to mention the designers who make them Jimmy Choo, Stuart Weitzman, Vera Wang, Prada, Christian Louboutin, Dior and so many more.

 

For guys or men there is no comparison for articles of clothing.  For women this *is* everything because more time is worried about shoes than the clothes that are worn. This is the non-verbal key.

 

Now if you want to master the skill of attraction, seduction or if you just want to impress a woman comment on how her shoes compliment or finish her outfit.  There is one bit of warning if you do this complement too soon in the conversation she will pick up on your fake complement and if you slide it in too late it will not fit in the conversation.

 

Reading female body language covers clothes, actions and even accessories.

 

In order for you to attract the girl you may need to increase you skills when relating to nonverbal communication and complementing shoes is one special key that unlocks many doors.  The attraction may not come from body signs or signals but your attention to detail and being able to complement it.

 

If you are a man and are competing with other men for the attention of a woman your ability to pick out some subtle clues may just help you.

 

Now this may not be of what you thought when you started to learn about seduction or even attraction but shoes are a simple topic to do some homework on. Go to a website where you could buy some women’s shoes. You could then learn about the types styles and manufacturers. Thinking ahead of other men and take some notes and your time invested would be less than half an hour or you could try and use the same old pick up line that other guys have tried.

 

Learning how to read, interpret and understand body language may increase your knowledge in more areas than facial expressions, body signs or even posture. It is ok to go and take physical field trips or even virtual trips to increase your ability to read non verbal communication.  Reading body language can open doors or even get you the girl when you know how to ask the right question or make the perfect statement.

 

I would like to thank you in advance for your comments and or questions.

 

Now go implement!

 

Scott Sylvan Bell  

Photo credits: Stiletto Shoe by Boaz Yiftach, Group Of Girls Partying by photostock

Reading body language: The non verbal language of women part 2

Reading body language of women: While understanding the body language of women it is important to remember that first you should observe her non verbal communication to determine or base line her actions. This understand of what is normal for her is a key to interpreting body language correctly.

 

The body language of women may differ from the body language of men in a few ways. Going back and understanding the natural born tendencies in women to protect themselves from men or attackers of either gender knowing where to stand or even how close in proximity is important.

 

If you are working on determining her non verbal communication to see if a woman is interested into you there are a few signs to look for when it comes to body language signs of attraction.

 

When a woman is attracted to you her body language will cause her to “preen”. This action of preening could include her playing with her hair or clothing or even an object like a glass. If in the animal world this would be a sign of the woman’s capability to clean and take care of herself but also at the same time demonstrating that she is a capable mate.

 

If a woman is attracted to you she may use smiles as her body language to get your attention. Now the smile that a woman would use would be a genuine smile and not the kind that kids make when taking pictures in the 3rd grade. This smile used as nonverbal communication would not be a constant smile because that may just be creepy and strange it would be a shorter gesture.  

 

Now sometimes women will flirt with men and they may just wink or blink at a guy. You may smile back at her and then she may wink or even raise her eyebrows as a sign that she is interested. In some instances she may even motion for you to come over this may be an overt sign of body language and would definitely mean that she is interested in you in some way or another.

 

While determining if she is attracted to you through her body language you can look at her feet belly button and neck dimple. Now these three items can help in indicating or understanding the body language of attraction. When a woman is interested in her she may be more inclined to point her feet in your direction when standing in a group or even if it is just the two of you. Looking at her proximity or how close she to you will help be a good judge or indicator. If she enters your bell bubble or gets closer than 18 inches this is a good sign that she is comfortable with you or even interested.

 

The next step to see if her body language is showing that she is interested in you would be to look at her belly button will help indicate attraction or if she is interested. When people are concerned about their safety they will do what they can to cover up vital organs and what is common when someone is nervous or even scared would be to cover the belly button. If you are looking at the feet of a woman to determine if she is attracted her belly button would also face you directly.

 

Adding one more layer to understanding the body language of women or attraction would to be the neck dimple. If her feet and her belly button are facing you then so should her neck dimple. This is the area above her collar bone but below her chin. This is another area of the body when would need to be protected in a time of danger and when it is left open shows that there is no fear or reason to be concerned.   

 

When all three areas of the feet, belly button and neck dimple line up these are good signs that there is attraction but this is not definite. This body language of women is important to understand as a basic safety need protect. If you are attracted to a women and she starts to cover these areas or directing them away form you it may mean that she is not interested and her body language of attraction is showing it.

 

To determine if a woman is interested in you checking her body language or looking at her eyes

Can help determine if she is interested or even flirting. In most instances when attraction is present in men or women the eyes will dilate or even stay fixated on you longer. This fixation could help you determine if she is attracted to you. There is always a downside when looking for body language signs of attraction and that is misunderstanding what the person is looking at. She may be looking at someone or something behind you if you are a distance apart. If you are closer in proximity there would be no mistake if she was looking at you with attraction.

 

Now if you are new to flirting with women or understanding the signs or signals of attraction keeping eye contact too long is not the right thing to do in fact it may just have the opposite effect and cause the person to think that you are strange. Interpreting the body language of flirting may take some time to learn if you have not learned about it previously.

 

When the body language of women turns to attraction her non verbal cues may include her skin changing color or becoming flush, her lips may become more red and in some instances her actions over all may become slower as to attract more attention. In some instances these moves may become seductive or even suggestive. In those specific instances the message should be very clear and it would not take mind reading to understand the situation. This seductive body language would not need you to be clairvoyant as to intentions.

 

More ways to determine if a woman is interested in you she may touch you on your arm or shoulder. Now this touch doesn’t always mean that there is attraction she may just be a kinesthetic or touchy person. You may have to take some time with this nonverbal communication to see what is going on. Now if you are used to women flirting with you would know what this “touch” would mean. If you are not used to women flirting with you it may take some time for you to catch on that she is interested in you. If you are not used to women touching you this action could possibly be misread very easily.  

 

She may take something from you as a playful action along with all of the other body language signs or signals of flirting or attraction. The taking of an object from you would be used as an attention getting device. At this point she may become more playful and even start laughing. This playful activity of flirting may common at any age and not just defined by one group.

 

As one last non verbal tip to see if a woman is interested in you at in a public setting you can look at your watch. The way that you would use this would require the help of a wing man. This action is very simple you would look at your watch as if you have somewhere to be if there is a woman who is attracted to you she will also look at her wrist as if there was a watch there. Your friend or wingman would then share with you who may have the possibility of being attracted to you. At this point you would either take the time to flirt with her or go over and use your verbal skills and talk to her.

 

Learning the body language of attraction for women or being able to read their non verbal communication when it comes to flirting can be misjudged so it is important to decipher the situation correctly. Your communication skills can be increased by learning and understanding what your body movements and actions can mean.

 

As always i would like to thank you for your comments and or questions.

Now go implement!

Scott Sylvan Bell

Photo credits: