Body language of mirroring

Mirroring body language: There are plenty of cool things that you can do when it comes to learning how to read body language or even interpret the nonverbal signs of men or women. One of the most important items that you can learn to help your persuasive abilities, best of all when done right you have some covert skills and it’s all nonverbal.

 

The term mirroring means that you would do nonverbally what the other person does:

  • ·         They woman touches her face, you touch your face
  • ·         She crosses her legs you cross your legs
  • ·         The man smiles you smile
  • ·         You yawn and then she yawns
  • ·         He touches you, you touch him back

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Wait it means that the mirroring and body language goes both ways?

 

Yes it does and you may have not ever noticed that salespeople may have mirrored you.

 

There is a point where you build enough rapport where they may start to follow you and then follow your lead (pace).

 

Body language mirroring of similar not exact

Mirroring body language can go wrong and that is for a few reasons and it makes your actions overt instead of covert:

 

Too similar too soon means that your reaction is too quick and that is a common body language mistake. The whole idea for your mirroring or copying is to be covert and not overt. When mirroring is done right the other person may or may not know that you are either pacing them or mirroring them.

 

Many times when people hear about or are shown mirroring they become too eager to get started and their movements are so quick that it isn’t really natural. These super skills that are supposed to help along with the process of rapport and or the persuasion process then end up hurting the person that they are supposed to help.

 

Just be patient when learning this new covert body language skill and you will be rewarded.

 

Body language of mirroring of similar

When mirroring a man or woman your bodies actions only have to be similar.

  • ·         When she touches her face you can touch you’re a few seconds later but do not touch it in the same exact spot
  • ·         When he crosses his legs you can wait a few seconds or a moment and then you cross your legs

 

 

Body language of pacing and leading

Pacing and leading is a strategy from NLP. Pacing means that you are following a man or woman. Leading would be when they are following you. Now throughout an interaction you can switch up the leader or the pacer.

 

You will know you are in good rapport when it goes both ways. At some moments it may be a body language strategy to give up some power and follow a man or woman and in some instances you may want to be in charge and have them follow you.

 

Body language of mirroring and touch

Now when it comes to touch there are common mistakes that you can make. In real time if you are waiting 5 – 10 seconds after someone makes movement for you to copy you will want to wait a few seconds longer if this action has to do with touch. You will have to practice this out with another man or woman that you know but you cannot tell them what you are doing to so that you can get the timing right. You can let the man or the woman in on your secret after you have practiced a few times. Mirroring touch has to feel natural or the situation will become very awkward.

 

Touching too quickly is also a common body language mistake.

 

Body language of mirroring and where to practice

How to learn body language made simple. You can practice mirroring body language anywhere and find it to be an effective use of nonverbal communication. You can just sit down at the coffee shop and watch a man or woman out of the corner of your eye and do a similar action and then when the man or woman changes their position you wait a few moments or even seconds and then do something similar but not exact. You may even want to watch the distance that you keep from the person when you make the touch so that you know where your proximics are or the “bell bubble”

 

Normally when someone hears about mirroring or wants to learn about it they make this common mistake for body language and that is to move too quickly.

 

As a side note while mirroring a man or woman out in public they may come over to you and ask questions like “Do we know each other”? This action is common along with them interacting with you somehow.

 

You can literally practice mirroring men or women’s nonverbal actions anywhere and get the same type of results. You may notice the next time someone is trying to influence you that they start to mimic or mirror your actions. You will be able to tell how good they are by their lag time or if they have just started by their ability to covertly mirror others.

 Learn how to read body lanagueg and get the most advanced knowledge possible:

As always I would like to thank you in advance for your comments and or questions about the body language of mirroring.

 

Now go implement!

 

 

 

Scott Sylvan Bell

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Body language expert Scott Sylvan Bell shares body language and mirroring: Video credit

Body language mistakes

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Body language mistakes: Now there are so many things that you can do right when using body language to be more persuasive. You don’t have to be an expert to know about body language that can offend others.

 

Now think for just a second about when you get to see a hidden message that others have not. It may happen on television or it can be something that you catch out of the corner of your eye. Now what if you were the one who made the body language mistake?

 

Body language mistakes in a covert manner

It is possible to have some covert messages or even embedded commands build into body language or non verbal communication. Now some of these messages are so strong that the “non verbal” element really doesn’t matter and the message really isn’t covert anymore.  

 

Salespeople make the body language mistake of letting their minds go on autopilot and allow their facial expressions and or hand gestures to display what they are thinking without thinking. The response that may happen is not always the best. In this instance the potential client does not have to be the best at reading people he or she is not engaged anymore and the chances of business happening are slim to none when these covert body language messages are caught.

 

The first thing for you to know if you live your life in a profession that requires your ability to persuade others is that your body language mistakes can be caught and beat. It is best for you to know about body language or nonverbal communication to help you understand the signs and signals that may allow others to interpret your message incorrectly.

 

Body language mistake of fingers

In the western culture it is common to point with your index finger, the digit closest to your thumb. Its not nice to point and this hand gesture can get you in trouble when done wrong because it can trigger the “rejection mechanism” in the mind of the person being pointed at.

 

There are some people who point with their middle finger …

 

And those people create problems for themselves with the covert body language mistake. Their message may not have a negative non verbal element but when the person gets caught by the brain with the hidden or covert body language message it is tough to recover because who is going to confront a person about being “flipped off” as its called here in the United states or even “flipping the bird”

 

What is body language? Very destructive when perceived wrong is the answer..

 

Its best to not point with anything but your index finger when need and if at all possible it is best to use a pen when available or an open palm. You don’t have to be an expert at reading people to know when the middle finger is used to convey a thought or message.

 

Learn how to read people like an expert with this course on body language

 

As always I would like to thank you in advance for your comments and or questions about common body language mistakes.

 

Now go implement!

 

Scott Sylvan Bell

 

Video credit: Body language expert Scott Sylvan Bell – Body language mistakes  

Reading body language of mirroring and rapport

Reading body language: People have the ability to build comfort while in the presence of others and the body language of rapport will give that comfort and that comes through the use of mirroring. All of these fancy words can be summed up as a way to help others be like you or you be like them.

 

First off for someone to be comfortable you will have to understand what the other person is doing with their body.

 

You must ask yourself a few questions to help build rapport and to use mirroring correctly.

 

Is the target person in a good or bad mood? This is important because you will need to know what is comfortable when mirroring and what is not because you will need to be similar.

 

Reading body language of mirroring
Reading body language skill of mirroring

You must also determine what your intention is and what you want to do, are you just trying to build comfort or mirror the person or are you trying to build rapport because they are two separate things.

 

Using body language by mirroring others to build comfort

Mirroring would just be to copy the actions of another person to build comfort as rapport follows after another word for this would be synchronicity.

 

When you mirror the body language that you read of the other person you will make similar actions that they do. Now there are some mistakes that people make when mirroring the body language of others to help build rapport:

  • Mirroring too quickly
  • Trying to hard to build comfort non verbally by being too similar

 

When you copy the body language of another person to mirror you will want to do this slowly and not at the same exact time as the other person this would be uncomfortable and the other person subconsciously or consciously would think something strange would be going on.

 

By moving too quickly you will give up your strategy and it may build mistrust.

 

If you are sitting and the target person crosses their legs you would wait a few seconds and cross your legs in a similar fashion it would not have to be exact.

 

If the person that you are mirroring reacts to changing their body language by changing theirs you have made a mistake at this point you would need to slow down. This going too quickly when mirroring others would fall into the trying too hard by doing to many items as the target person.

 

You don’t have to be in the exact position as the other person just similar this is where the trying too hard comes in.

 

Body language reading can help you build rapport

If the goal is to build comfort through the use of body language or non verbal communication taking your time with the other person is the key to both of these items.

 

Building rapport is a term used in Neuro Linguistic Programming or NLP it means that you are similar, not exact and that happens from mirroring another person. Synchronicity would be another explanation of rapport. Similar but not exact is key.

 

  • The person slouches in their chair and then so do you a few seconds or even a minute later in a similar fashion but not exact.
  • The person folds their arms and then so do you a few seconds or even a minute later in a similar fashion but not exact.
  • The person crosses their legs and then so do you a few seconds or even a minute later in a similar fashion but not exact.

 

Once again the key here is similar but not exact and a little slower than the other person.

 

Reading body language of building rapport
Reading body language while building rapport

The places that you can use mirroring and rapport can be numerous.

  • Work
  • Dating
  • At a party
  • At the coffee shop
  • At church

 

The places and times that you can use this body language skill are endless. Learning how to read the signs and signals of body language can be done through practicing mirroring to gain rapport.

Body language reading assignment

To learn how to build rapport by mirroring you can use a simple strategy to learn this talent.

 

Decide to spend some time out for an hour somewhere that there are other people who you can mirror. The best thing is to not attract too much attention to yourself and just be similar to a person that you choose. Now this target can be a man or a woman and it doesn’t matter their age.

 

Do as much of your work mirroring and build rapport through your peripheral vision. Remember to go slow and make your moves a little slower than the other person. As your starting to gain rapport you will notice yourself starting to want to move faster this is a sign that you are getting close to rapport.  This also means that your body language reading is close to what it needs to be.

 

After accepting this assignment that will not only help you learn how to read body language but will also give you the skill of mirroring and then building rapport. You may just find while doing this skill building exercise that the people that you mirror and then build rapport with will approach you in some instances.

 

This exercise may just help you get a new boyfriend or girlfriend in a covert way without them knowing why they were attracted to you. You may just gain a new client or even help yourself get out of a tense situation.

 

 Learn how to read body language like an expert

 

As always I would like to thank you in advance for your comments and or questions about mirroring and rapport.

 

Now go implement!

 

Scott Sylvan Bell

 

Romantic Young Couple Enjoying Their Love by photostock,Fashion Models by photostock  :Body language reading photo credits

Reading body language of flirting men and women part 1

Reading body language: Flirting has to be one of the most mysterious items when it comes to people wanting to know how to read body language.

 

Understanding and interpreting what others mean when they flirt almost seems like a secret passed down between secret societies.

 

Flirting is something that you do with your body language to see if another person is interests in you. Sometimes this flirting can be done to get just a little attention or it can be done to find a date with a man or a women or it can even be done on the path to a soul mate.

 

Knowing what each part of the body can do to help you flirt gives you an advantage, it can also clue you in why you keep meeting interesting people and they think that you are into them.

 

Flirting women and their body language
Reading body language of flirting women for dating

Reading the body language men or women flirting or even learning how to flirt with a man or woman can be fun and find you some new friends.

 

Learning and understanding these nonverbal cues will tune you in to all the times where someone has flirted with you and you were oblivious to the body language that the person was using to flirt with you.

 

To learn how to flirt it may take a visit to some information learned from pick up artists (PUA). One of the first rules taught to men who want to learn how to pick women up is the “Three second rule” this rules states that the woman, man or “target” should either be approached or flirted with within 3 seconds of finding interest in the person so that you do not build up internal resistance.

 

The body language of flirting can follow these rules but you don’t have to. Flirting can be done on your own time but understand that if you decide to take too long with setting the “hook” on some sort of attraction the man or woman that you are interested in may not ever get your nonverbal messages.

 

To learn how to flirt you must first learn what tools that you have on your body first, they are from the top:

  • Your head
  • Your eyebrows
  • Your eyes
  • Your mouth
  • Your body
  • Your hands

 

Now this may seem like it could just be your whole body to make flirting happen and that can be the case also.

 

Using your head to flirt

When you flirt with a man or a woman your head is used as a way to show interest in the other person. Sometimes with your body language you will decide to tilt you head towards the person or “target” you are interested in and when you are done playing with your “target” you may decide to pull away.

 

The tilting of your head towards a person or a way from a person can show interest and begin to flirt. This is the first part of the equation of flirting and not meant to be the whole series of actions but to start at the top of the body is the best place.

 

If you learn how to tilt your heard correctly during conversations this skill can be used for far more than flirting it can be used for persuasive sales skills. This is just one of the parts for one of the first steps. You must build a foundation to correctly convey the body language of flirting.

 

Reading body language of flirting women
Reading body language can teach you flirting by women

While talking with another person the tilting of the head slightly to forwards, backwards to the left or to the right can convey interest in the subject or the person almost as if you are asking the other person to tell you more by pulling your ear away from them slightly and the opposite would to be to tilt your head towards the person as to show you do not believe what they are saying.  This skill must be practiced flirt before you try to flirt if you do not know what you are doing. Use the flirting exercise below.

 

Flirting exercise

Now you can test this while talking to another person by slightly leaning your head into the conversation to see the reaction of the other person and then you will want to do the opposite and lean your head out of conversations lightly. A word of warning when overdone the other person will think that you are strange so you must be careful with how far you lean your head towards or away from a person and how often you do this. Slight tilt is the key for this nonverbal strategy to work.

 

On of the best places to practice the body language of flirting is at a place far from your home where you know that you will not run into people you will ever see again that way there is no real risk if someone thinks you are strange but if you find someone who is interested the sky is the limit for you.

 

As always I would like to thank you in advance for your comments and or questions about the body language of flirting.

 

Now go implement!

 

Scott Sylvan Bell

 

Photo credits:Gossiping by Ambro, Smiling Woman by David Castillo Dominici

Reading body language; Is cologne or perfume a non-verbal skill?

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Reading body language:

You may find that when learning how to read a persons non verbal skills there is much more than just what the body is doing or what the mouth is saying.

 

Take for example what type of accessories that they are wearing

 

Or if they are close in proximity to another person, or maybe even too close.

 

What about those small things that could be making the difference that you may never even have thought of?

 

Do you think that Cologne or Perfume could be a part of your nonverbal communication or a way to read people?

 

What happens if you are that girl and trying to get the attention of a guy but at the same time trying to figure out the body language of the guy?

 

You meet him and all of the sudden you find that he is wearing too much cologne?

 

Now all of the sudden you are questioning his self control and even worse you may not be so attracted to the man any more.

 

 

You could even go the other way and you are a man looking for a women and you find what you are looking for but while meeting the girl you smell some wild flowery perfume that you cant stand. Now you want nothing to do with the girl you may have been interested in.

 

You can even put this in the form of a business conversation and question if you were going to meet a new client. It would not matter how good your persuasive selling skills are, all of your work would be destroyed by wearing too much scent.

 

Ok, so you may not think that how you smell is part of nonverbal skills, you may think that everything you do when you communicate only comes from words.

 

What happens when you have a negative reaction to you just because of the way you smell and maybe it isn’t cologne or perfume, it could be the soap that you use, it could be you forgot to put on some deodorant.

 

In any sense if people react to you from your words, your actions or even your smell you are indeed communicating.

 

Smell does cover a part of communication any time that there is a reaction negative or positive.

 

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Body language and non verbal skills become powerful tools when you know how to use them or even read what a person is saying without hearing one word from them. The clairvoyant read may just be from seeing a facial expression.

 

As a general rule when it comes to cologne or perfume and you being judged by your non-verbal actions less is more or a little dab will do you.

 

To change up the smell or communication of smell a slight bit lets move past cologne or perfume for a second.

 

Some real estate agents will tell homeowners to bake some cookies a few hours before showing a home for the positive feelings that they can cause. Many people have great feelings about cookies and the smell would piggyback that feeling.

 

The way that salespeople could use smell or cologne would not make sense until you take a look at how the smell would help your communication skills.

 

Take for instance that some older salespeople will wear cologne so that they can remind younger people the smell of their grandfathers or people of similar age feelings of the past. As you read on there may be a downside to using smell as a non verbal selling skill.

 

If you shop at some of the high end stores where colognes and perfumes can cost over $300 per bottle it is common for the saleswomen to wear men’s cologne in the areas that sell perfumes and for the salesmen to wear perfume when selling cologne.

 

Think for a second how this would help the person buying the scents.

 

Most times that a person is buying a scent it is for someone special and many times that person is the opposite sex. The scent becomes familiar to the buyer and is softer or more masculine either way depending on who is buying

 

Also be aware that people associate smells like they do songs with feelings and if you are wearing a smell that has been a part of a bad experience all of the sudden you are within the realms of that past bad experience. Now it really would not matter how much self-control you are capable of when it comes to your body language you would lose the:

  • ·         Girl
  • ·         Guy
  • ·         Job
  • ·         Possible friend or new associate

 

There is a saying that “you never get a second chance for a first impression” and that could not be truer for verbal and non-verbal communication skills.

 

As always I would like to thank you for your comments and or questions.

 

Now go implement!

 

Scott Sylvan Bell